Sta.sh
My Broken Promises
I know \ you don't need to remind me anymore
I heard / those heartfelt words many times before
You remember I said I would always be there for you when you needed me
But instead, I just upped and left the both of us, so heartlessly
Knowing very well that you're the most important person, I'm so sorry
Maybe these words of my inner hurt will help you understand clearly
I always thought that my first kiss ever would be with a special someone
But it was taken away from me in a split second, the loss cannot be undone
And I planned to keep my virginity for a little while longer, I wasn't ready yet
But I was robbed of it, the exploring hands and eyes is what I will never forget
One day, a person can be young, and hopeful, and oh-so innocent
The next, life has changed, and the remorse makes everything different
I hope \ you believed me when I said I'd never let go
I wished / that no one would ever find my suicide note
When I was planning to walk this path I knew there was no turning back, no fear, no regrets
The choice is mine, and mine alone, because once I'm gone there is no guilt to be felt and left
I just couldn't think of how I would hurt anyone else, all I wanted was the pain to finally stop
Only yearning for peace; to be put at ease; to finally sleep; to rest; for my lifeless body to drop
I always said that I loved to be alive, but I was just giving you the sense that I was alright
My mind was broken, everything was wrong, I just didn't want you to worry, but I was a living lie
I needed you to believe I was okay, and safe, even when you seen those bottled up tears in my eyes
Even though you saw me break down those few times, when I collapsed to my knees and finally cried
I fell apart sometimes, because I couldn't keep up that act forever, it was always building up
I couldn't smile all the time, I had to let it sink down, this pointless charade was just too tough
I hurt \ you in a way that is unforgivable, when I prematurely cut my life story short
I prayed / over and over that in time, the memory of me will eventually wither and grow cold
Realizing that no one would ever truly understand how I really felt
They could never help me deal with this inner pain that I regretfully held
I just couldn't hang on any longer, I had to end everything, the pain was just too real
Go ahead, call me weak, but anyone would make the same choice if they could feel what I feel
But believe me, I did try to turn myself around, after every fall, and every other fucking mistake
But nothing worked, like turning over a dead leaf, and watching a hopeless chance get taken away
This torturous life of mine must have not been meant to be
That must be why it was meant to just be thrown away coldly
Please try to understand that my pain has made me careless
But I don't expect you to forgive me, for I have broken every promise
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You have shut me out for 6 montths. Why? How can I help you? I know most o ot,and I am still here,aren't I ?
END THE SILENCE. MEET ME TONIGHT I love the poem
love it
I felt my world tumble, collapse and shake.
You were there for my support, I made promises to you
But something broke inside, something missing, everything askew.
I cried silent tears, never showing them once for you to see
And whenever you were around, I would wipe them quietly.
I never wanted for you to see my pain,my hurt, my broken life
I wanted to keep that all for me and burden you with strife.
And then sorrow and despair swalloed me whole
down went my mind, my heart, my soul.
Depression took over and reasoned with my head
saying that there was a much easier path instead.
Pain struck out and lashed at my heart
crunching me, killing me, taking me apart.
And finally the darkness, the hopelessness took over my soul
so I finally decided that my final place in this world, my final role
would be to disappear, silently fade away
although it was you I would ultimately betray.
I took a step too far off a very high ledge
and death cut through me with an ice cold edge.
I fade to black as tears roll down for the last time
and I break all my pledges to you, my worst and final committed crime...