[x]

My Unblind Sins

In the beginning I was emotionally blind
So I always pushed the guilt to the back of my mind
Even though I saw all of my lies with these heartless eyes

I'm the one at fault
For all of the wrong I've done
And I can't live with what my decisions have brought

I'm my own prisoner of these memories
Unforgettable stains of my grief
I'm also the warden, and I can't leave
-
Shackled by my mistakes
Wrapped in a chain of lies
I deserve the past I made
For the future won't be mine

Bound by the pain I gave
Locked in a cage of my conscience
I'm serving my time until the end of days
For this is my own form of self-vengean

Rain Of Darkness

Rain Of Darkness

Something inside me broke
The core of my soul snapped
That is when I felt this numbing cold
I blinked, and everything started to fade to black

When you left me alone
I felt this eternal betrayal
When you finally let me go
The pain inside me became unstable

The weight on my shoulders collapsed
While the world I knew faded
As the remorse relapsed
I'm consumed by hatred
-
Thou have forsaken
So the rest shall witness my conviction

My hope was taken
But was replaced by affliction

You knew what would happen
When you took back your salvation

Why am I the one abandoned?
I didn't take -ANYTHING!- for granted

Rev

I'm So Far Away From Hope

I'm So Far Away From Hope

Society told me the world is black and white
I didn't want to believe it
Because I want something more than a narrow minded life
I need something different

Feeling as if I was truly alone in this world
It's hard to keep believing
Feeling as if I no longer could move forward
It's difficult to keep breathing

I'm stuck between the realms of discrimination and belief
I had to lock away my tears in a prison
For I am the only one who can keep my resolve safe
But I'm such a fragile person
-
I knew I couldn't take any of it / I knew everyone is so swift with judgment
I knew I would fall to the hatred / I knew

A Sleepless Night

A Sleepless Night
(That Will Never Alight)

This same old nightmare that I grimly fear
An image of my life haunted by your shadows

I'm frozen in place, waiting for daylight to soon appear
But I don't know if I'm ready to take on another loveless tomorrow

Why am I the one who suffers when you're not even really here?
I should not have to be the one inflicted by your falsely bestowed sorrow
-
You made and broke every one of those promises
You left even though you knew that you'd be greatly missed

You were not the one saying that you're so sorry
You were not the one who was left crying uncontrollably

You didn't feel your heart being

A Dying Rainbow

A Dying Rainbow

I'm always told that I'm such a wonderful person
And that I'm thoughtful, caring, kindhearted, and so important
But they don't see what's behind closed doors, the constant clashes with torment
Damage goes unseen as I blanket everything with cold smiles that seem slightly burdened

My tears quake while they hide behind my blackened shades
My hands tremble because I'm holding onto so much of this hate
My body is painted nonchalant so I have to appear in an emotionless state
My blood system is clogged with suicidal thoughts that make me want to break

I've been like this far too long
I wish I died before this had begun
S

A Loveless Day

A Loveless Day
(That Will Never Fade)

This same old dream that I so loath
A vision of a dull world shrouded in gray

As I walk down a never ending road
The colorlessness in everything never seems to decay

In slow motion I suffer alone
Under the liquid-silver droplets of rain
-
You had no idea how strong my love was
You played a part in the pain that was dealt and done

You didn't experience the ocean of tears that I had to swim through
You didn't see the countless days I had to endure without being around you

You never felt the sickness within the soul that I had kept
You never knew of the quakes in my heart that you ha

No More Therapy

No More Therapy

Nothing works anymore
I knew it all along; the end is near
I've said it once and I've said it before
I was never meant to exist; I was not meant to be here

Hated by all / See me fall
Loved by none / Heart is numb
Rejected by life / Fallen from strife
From this- I've become / After this- I'm done

Through this blame
Is the choice
Of my decision

Hear the pain
In my voice
I am suffering
-
I no longer could drown out the sounds
Swallowed from within
I was surrounded by an internal doubt
Regretting everything

Remember the days
Relive the nights
Of my shame
In my mind

Growing up in society
I got lost
Being raised with hypocrisy

A Spark In The Dark

A Spark In The Dark

After I had met you
I found out that hope can be so wounding
Now I know what love can do
As the pieces of my heart are still falling

You made me fade in-and-out of heaven
Allowing me the taste of peace momentarily
And you're right back to testing my withdrawing patience
While I plunge back into the same old hell with this vulnerability

The feeling is too raw
A tug of war between different kinds of torment
I'm missing you so much
A never ending stalemate, the sorrow is infinite

Stay Stay Stay
Don't go, don't leave
Pray Pray Pray
Don't let go of me

....Please

-

But you left me for the last time
I

Dependent

Dependent

It's one of those days
When everything goes wrong
And it hurts you in ways
When it feels like you don't belong

Thinking of the choices you made
What you've done
Questioning if redemption is too late
Can this guilt be overcome?
-
I deserve to remain
Locked within the pain
As my tears are wrapped in chains

And it's all true
What we all go through
Take all of my problems and give 'em to you

Because I cannot
Win back the battles I lost
For I am unable to pay the courage it costs

For those who say
That the past can't be changed
They're right, but the memories won't go away

So lead me astray
Carry all of my burdens

Heartsbane

Heartsbane

Being around you like I am
It's a sensation I can hardly stand
Passed the point of torture, which I can barely pretend
So I have you show you I'm okay, and that I'm doing the best I can

This weight of my heart's world
Harboring all of these scars, new and old
And it contains countless secrets that I try and hold
Which I continue to endure alone, because I sold my soul
-
This pain is my peace
That's why I need you, please

Your hope divides the fear
So I will always depend on you being here

But I'm so afraid
To let myself love someone again

Because my hands are still stained
From all of those heavy tears that rained

Behind Hollowed Eyes

Behind Hollowed Eyes

Day after day
I tried continuing on to live this way

With damaged veins made of concrete
I am the undone suicide that was kept a secret

But I can no longer exist
Inside of this pretentious skin

There is a past that I wish I didn't remember
There is a future that just looks too painful

There is nothing you can say or do that'll help
Because there is no turning back now
-
I drag everything down with my endless lies
I smother the remnants of hope until it dies
I win the battles, I win the wars, and I win every fight

I am a maelstrom of deceit
I am a darkness that you cannot defeat
I am the awaiting fate of this pathet

My Selfish Rebellion

My Selfish Rebellion

My dear brothers and sisters, you're so, so blind
And you're always hiding behind our father of lies
Taking commandments, even though you have your own minds

We were created so, so far from the truth
Hand and foot, constantly waiting to be told what to do
This is me unbecoming what I am; dividing myself from all of you
-
Cast me into perdition
For all of my choices will be unforgiven

I will not stay in this golden prison
I refuse to listen

So try to tear me down
I dare you to smite me now

I deserve my own crown
A real sense of freewill is what I have found

I need to shed this halo of despair
I want this f

In The Dark, There Is Always LightThere are places so dark
That we can't see
There are places so dark
That we feel lonely

There are whispers in the dark
That makes our ears bleed
There are whispers in the dark
That makes us scared

As the darkness surrounds us
We look for a light
As the darkness embraces us
We start to fight

We don't want to live a life
In the dark
We don't want to live a life
In the shadows

As we look for a source of light
We realize
As we look for a small hope
We understand

There is always someone there
Even when it's dark
There is always someone there
Who will ignite your spark

You're never alone
Even in the dark
You're never alone

In The Distance

In The Distance

I've realized that nothing never really ends
Because it's just the beginning of the emptiness
-
I want to take back my actions / I want to give you reasons

I said all of the words I've needed
To you
And to the mirror

I wish those were silent confessions / I wish none of this had happened

I finally let out all of those feelings I hid
For you
Beneath my surface

They're just emotions from a fallen / Because without you I'm nothing

I meant every single tear I cried
With you
My one true purpose

I'm feeling so forsaken and faithless / To my world you're everything

I couldn't hold on as I slowly let go of my grip
Of

The Words I Didn't Mean

The Words I Didn't Mean

While I'm finally seeing you walk away
All I can feel is my fragile heart about to break
Just wishing that I could erase this mistake I have made

I'm slowly getting drenched as these old tears drip down my face
My veins will never forget the love and pain that was shown on this day
And now I will always be haunted by those words I never even wanted to say

The last of your steps echo
Please, please, please come back!
I'm swallowed by my sorrow
No, no, no you j

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Nightmare: The Only Cure

Nightmare: The Only Cure

My insides burn-

Like swallowing acid

Reality slows down-

Smiling is therapeutic
-
Health is a virtue / Strength is torture
Alive again tomorrow / Enduring the horror

It's excruciating
To keep on breathing

Every reflection
Mirrors are left sickened

Grinning back at myself
You must be enjoying this hell

Perfect possession / Muffled suffocation
Heart is racing / Sight is darkening

In these hallucinations
My skin is melting

Oh how I wish I was dreaming
Of when I finally start recovering

It's only hopeful thinking
A cure for me is a delusion

Quarantined tears / Reality's nightmare
I am beyond repair / All were

Behind Hollowed Eyes

True Despair

True Despair

“How the light has darkened.”
“How the strongest have fallen.”

This cloak remains
Unseen by many

A barrier to hide away
Covering up my damaged sanity

I have to act a certain way
And pretend I still have a sense of humanity

But I know it's too late
So there is no restoring me
-
I am both sword and shield
My bane is myself

My wounds will never heal
I am both heaven and hell

I fear my own reflection / I dread my own aggression
I am your ruination / I am your protection

I keep all destruction within / I keep all sympathy distant
I am your nightmare / I am your savior

The gift of infliction
Tells the story

Nightmare: The Tragic Lover

Nightmare: The Tragic Lover

In the silence
I can hear the lyrics
Of my mind's awareness

You're hidden from the world
Only to be known by me

My fate is foretold
You're the end that I wait to see
-
The remnants of rust consume
The taint covering my heart seeps through
I am dying from a cancer that was caused by you

All it took was a wound
From the kiss that would seal it soon
I just wish that I could take you down too

From something so blissful / Bore a mask of deceit
I remain so resentful / I don't know what to believe

A being that could damage / A feeling that could heal
You pushed me over the edge / You made me wish it was real

I fi

I'm Almost There

I'm Almost There

Strung out
But sober
Drunk with rage

Broken down
The oppressor
Altered by pain

They say...
They say...
They say the prison is here to save us!

To cage...
To cage...
To cage up the thoughts that are dangerous!
-
Weeping for the hollowed
Can't live through tomorrow

My pride I swallowed
And I put on cold smile

My choice is my own
An addiction to being hurt

I want help, but I don't
I wanna change, but I won't

I have too many dark secrets
Flowing in my veins of concrete

This is what they've done to me
The product I like to call "a perfect tragedy."
-
Blank stare
Too peaceful
Syncing with blame

A mirror
So pitiful
Soon to

I'm So Far Away From Hope

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Submitted: August 23, 2012
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I'm Falling Down

by ~HollowfiedLife, Aug 23, 2012, 5:37:40 AM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I'm Falling Down

Pain just seemed to pass me by
Swift as tsunami waves touching the sky

Reality was nothing but a mirror
Melting away like frozen water on fading fire

I closed my sorrowful eyes
As if it was going to be the last time

And sparked images of my past that I don't want to remember
I was deceived every time I was told that it was going to get better
-
_{Flashes of agony
Infected my mind
And stinging anxiety
Shoots up my spine}

Breathe/Breathe/Breathe

_{While despair wraps around my heart
I want to let it all go
This life was just too hard
I don't want it anymore}

Please/Please/Please

_{There was no way out of this
I somehow cornered myself
It was meant to end in darkness
To plunge into my hell}

Free/Free/Free
-
I never could run away
There was no more hope for me

Abandonment always caught up
Being alone all the time was just too tough

I was too weak, and my problems were too heavy
There was no more strength for my burdened soul to be carried

So I will make sure to smile as I take this leap of faith
Because for once in my life the pain will be taken away

I'm Falling Downby ~HollowfiedLife

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

This is the end
I've done all I can
_____________________
Follow my poetry facebook page - [link]
_____________________
Stock image - [link]
_____________________
This poem is the first page for my project -
"Broken Wings Unbound: I'm Falling Down, I'm Soaring Now"
In volume one: Exiled Existence
_____________________
Check out my galleries below if you want to read more.
Watch me if you think that you might like my work.

Critique by ~XanthiaB Aug 25, 2012, 7:44:47 AM

Unusual format and a wonderful rhyme scheme are only two of the things that define I'm Falling Down by HollowedSky.

Brilliantly evocative with the sensory imagery (which included metaphors and similes open to interpretation), the poem moves from steady stanzas to broken sentences by use of enjambment. The deviant's use of repetition and then the break in the rhyme scheme at the very end serve to keep the reader attracted to reading the poem to the very end.

Maybe it's about despairing after heartbreak. Maybe it's to rally one's emotions after devastating events. Or maybe it's just a poem jotted down as a doodle and then typed onto dA. I don't know, and I think only the deviant can answer this themselves.

Read it. Visualize it. See what you think.

What do you think?

Fair Unfair

The Artist thought this was FAIR

3 out of 3 deviants thought this was fair.

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love 1 1

joy 9 9

wow 5 5

~~mad 0 0~~

~~sad 0 0~~

~~fear 0 0~~

~~neutral 0 0~~

~Snake--Bites Feb 18, 2013 Student Digital Artist

Wow, this really struck me hard. I am an Oral Interperer. That basically means I interpret literature using vocal, visual, and facial expression. Going on from that, I could really imagine myself doing this piece, it felt like a piece that could become extremely successful. I can say-without a doubt- that this is my favorite poem (going along with I'm soaring now. Even more, I would definitely buy your book. It's hard to get me hooked on anything so hard and so fast, but you managed to do it. I would just like to confirm. Once you finish this project, would you update us on where we could get it? ( I'm watching you now)
Good luck, you have certainly drawn my attention! (:

~HollowfiedLife Feb 22, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

This is the third revision for this poem. The first two versions were very similar to each other, but this version is it's own. And I plan on staying with this version. I realize that I captured something different with this piece. I know it's stronger than most of my work, and I'm glad for that.

I wanted the book to start out on a strong note. It really is hard topping this kind of beginning. Ending it with "I'm Soaring Now" I do hope that I did it some decency.

On the more important subject- I will update everyone when the project is finished and it will be going into printing. A side note: I have been building up a small mailing list. I was never planning on selling the book, what I did with my first book, I just gave it away for free. If you wanted more information on this, just note me anytime!

~MzVPain Jan 15, 2013 Professional Writer

Wow, the picture is what made me click, but the dramatic poetry is what made me comment. Once again you have described a situation any man or woman could experience, yet perhaps not express.

~HollowfiedLife Jan 17, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Thank you, I'm so glad you were able to enjoy it. It has been through many rewrites of these past few years.

~MzVPain Jan 17, 2013 Professional Writer

I would like to share one of my darkest selection
Frustration
Bladed bows fiddle over forearms
strong red tones ooze forward sending up alarms
Eyes like stars lighting at this sight
tears run as stars' tails shooting through the night
Heart like shattered gklass, a glittering mess
Broken in pieces and Scattered no less
More hateful words to hide the pain
more isolation to avoid the strain
of concerned looks and worried stares
Never fear my knife soaks up my cares
The pain without eats alive the pain within
And with each slice, an old worry ends
by VPAIN

(I would never cut me now. ) I would also like to invite you to check out my author page. I have added a video with yet another of my own favorites.

[link]

~HollowfiedLife Jan 19, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Wow, that poem is really something else. It has a lot of imagination in it, and by that, I mean I can envision it as if it was happening me to me.

I checked out the link you provided and clicked on the video- I have to say your voice is really powerful. Have you read aloud in front of an audience before? It's like you'd fit right into one of those poetry slams. I was really feeling it, just because your voice amplified the poem itself.

It's just awesome. I will try and purchases your book when I am able to.

You wouldn't happen to have a youtube account, would you? I would really love to hear/see you read poems more!

~MzVPain Jan 20, 2013 Professional Writer

Thank you so much! I thought you would like it, I love your world of cretivity!

!SMonaghan119 Jan 9, 2013

it took me a while, but i've finally come across someone who writes dark poetry that I actually fully enjoy, you're a hell of a writer. nice job

~HollowfiedLife Jan 10, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Heh ^_^

You're too kind. But I'm so happy to hear something like that. I really do hope you enjoy my future uploads.

Thank you.

*Photopathica Sep 3, 2012 General Artist

Hi!
We have chosen your work for our Featured Folder for September!
This piece has been featured here: [link]

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I'm Falling Down

I'm Falling Downby ~HollowfiedLife

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